I had a dream last night that I was at Disneyland with a bunch of my friends from New York City. We were arguing over which rides to go on. I remember Thunder Mountain and Pirates of the Caribbean were deemed “not scary enough.” My reply was “we’re at Disneyland — none of the rides are scary.” It was a very bizarre dream. Toward the end I had to say goodbye to everyone, and some people stalked off without even a wave.

Such is my life these days.

The night before I dreamed I was still in NYC and still packing my entire life. It was two days before I left and everyone really wanted to throw me a party. They didn’t seem to get it that I didn’t have time for a party — I had too much packing to do. Ah the joy of anxiety dreams!

Wyoming is beautiful. I have been helping my dad bake Christmas cookies, shoveling the 12+ inches of snow that fell, and reading in front of the fire. I haven’t had a lot of time for reading lately, so it’s been nice. I finally got around to The Story of Edgar Sawtelle which has been on my to-read list since mid-June. I read 576 pages in less than three days so it must have been good. Time to find another book to read from my parents’ shelves.

I awoke this morning to a welcome email from Apple. It’s a nice presentation of what to expect my first week of work. It made me laugh, and gave me warm-fuzzies about the world I’ll be joining in the new year.

Today’s activities include wrapping gifts, baking more Christmas cookies, and taking my father holiday shopping. I’m enjoying my downtime … if only the anxiety dreams about NYC would go away.

Wishing everyone I know a wonderful holiday season!


Today is my last day as a New Yorker. I am deeply sad and having problems coming to terms with this fact. I was up at 4 AM thinking about the move, and how sad I am to leave this wonderful city and my amazing friends here. But leave I must, it's time for me to be challenged in new ways and to explore a new area.

Today is a bit of fun and a bit of packing and schlepping. Ugh. But the end is in site, and I have good friends to help me along the way.

I read this quote this morning and thought it was beautiful.

The deep parts of my life pour onward,
as if the river shores were opening out.
It seems that things are more like me now,
that I can see farther into paintings.
I feel closer to what language can't reach.
With my senses, as with the birds, I climb
into the windy heaven, out of the oak,
and in the ponds broken off from the sky
my feeling sinks, as if standing on fishes.

– Rainer Maria Rilke (translated by Robert Bly)

I am going to try to post more frequently during my life transition.

Tomorrow is my last day of work at ASME. It's hard for me to believe I'm really leaving. Yes, I am in denial. Despite the fact that I have shipped 33 boxes to the left coast, I don't think my brain will wrap itself around the move until I fly to California on January 2nd.

Last days are hard. There's so much you want to do and so little time. I spent my last Sunday in NYC in my apartment, cleaning and organizing and not talking because I had no voice. Laryngitis struck on Saturday night, and I really couldn't talk for most of the day. Today was better, but I have that husky phone-sex operator voice that is so coveted … I'm resting it again tonight with tea, lemon and honey, hoping that I can salvage my voice enough to survive my going away party tomorrow night.

Today was my last Monday as a New Yorker. I had my last fancy lunch with my colleagues and my last beer at Zipper Bar with EB. I had my last lunch at Gingerman this past Friday with Joe-Scott, and my last dinner with L & E over a week ago. I realize that these don't have to be forever lasts, but they will be the last time I do these things as a resident of this fair city, and that has me melancholy. Yet the denial is keeping me from tears.

I plan to continue my week of lasts with meals at favorite places and time with favorite people …

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I've been thinking and talking about it for a while — leaving New York — but in an abstract "someday maybe" way. Well, now it's here. I'm officially leaving New York City, *sigh*. After six years it's a bitter-sweet farewell. However, opportunities presented themselves that I cannot pass up, and so it's time.

I've accepted a Digital Content Manager position for iTunes U with Apple in Cupertino, CA starting on January 5, 2009. It's an amazing opportunity, and gets me closer to family. I'll be living mere minutes from a handful of aunts and uncles, more than a dozen cousins, and a smattering of good friends from various parts of my life. I'm excited, and nervous. It's going to be a big change, but I've wanted to be out west so it's a good change.

Now I just have to pack my entire life and ship it cross-country. I leave NYC on December 20th — heading for Wyoming to spend the holidays with my parents and sister. I'll be in California shortly after the new year, ready for a fresh start. Crazy! It's so soon!

I'm going to miss NYC a lot — more than I know, but it will always be here if I want to come back. For the most part, my heart is ready to be back in the west.

I hope that with the change, I can blog more often about the transition and life in general.

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I missed a flight, while sitting at the gate it departed from. You may be asking yourself, "how can this be?" and I still do not know the answer …

10 a.m. arrive San Jose airport to catch 11 a.m. flight to L.A. — it's a commuter jet so I expected small planes, small gates, etc.

10:05 a.m. Self and baggage are checked, proceed through security without incident.

10:15 a.m. Purchase Sees Candy and sourdough bread because you cannot get it on the right coast.

10:35 a.m. arrive at designated gate 10 yards from the store. I do not see any Delta people at the gate and wonder if the flight is delayed or canceled. Wait patiently to board flight. See a random Delta person walking back and forthe between a gate around the corner, want to flag him down but he is busy looking like a chicken with his head cut off on the phone and radio. Confirm woman next to me is on the flight to LA too.

10:55 a.m. Walk 10 yards to check board to see if gate change. Nothing. Call white courtesy phone to find out about gate agent. They tell me to go to the ticket counter — um wrong answer I'm not going through security again!

11:00 a.m. get in line at other gate to talk to the guy who has been acting like a dying chicken. Notice the flight status is now "closed". The gate agent insists he called and paged the flight and that it's my fault for missing the flight. I insist that I have been sitting there for 20+ minutes. I ask how they can close the flight without a final boarding call, and without paging passengers who have checked in for the flight but not boarded. We both find witnesses, but it DOESN'T MATTER BECAUSE I HAVE STILL MISSED THE FLIGHT, DESPITE THE FACT I WAS SITTING RIGHT THERE.

Apparently there is no other way to get to NYC today so I am re-booked for tomorrow for a $140 fee. Yep, I missed the flight because the gate agent was absent/stupid, and I still have to pay a change fee. I'm told my bags will be in JFK tonight as scheduled (hello, post 9/11 rules say bags cannot fly without their accompanying passenger, yet my bag has made the flight I missed while sitting in front ot the gate).

I start crying out of frustration. I call my aunt, still crying, and ask her to come back and get me so I don't have to spend any more time at the stupid airport.

12 p.m. I go back to my aunt's house for salad and beer. I manage to laugh at the stupidity of the situation. I am still baffled as to how I can miss a flight while sitting right there.

Rest assured that Delta will be receiving an angry/confused letter from me.

I will try this all again tomorrow — being sure to go to the gate right after clearinng security so as not to miss the boarding call which apparently only happens 30+ minutes before departure.

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Yes, I still owe you posts from China. I'm working on it. Just trying to get some technical aspects figured out because I want things to be easier …

But, I did want to let you all know that I have some more trips in the near future.

  • A 3-day jaunt to Florida for meetings next week — hoping it's sunny and warm-ish so I can work on my tan.
  • A long weekend in Panama starting March 6. Beach time with good friends and cocktails are involved with that one. Will take a lot of pictures, and time with those friends always produces good stories.
  • A week-long sojourn in Vancouver and April for meetings. I love Vancouver, and haven't had more than a night there in years, so that will be exciting.
  • At least one if not two trips to San Francisco — one in August, and maybe one this spring. A combo of work and family visits.
  • Trying to get to my parent's in Wyoming in April for some spring skiing (400" of snow so far this year means spring skiing should be good). Plus, a dear friend is having a baby in May and I'd love to attend the shower.
  • Also trying to get to Oregon to see my college gals.
  • Lobbying for work trips to India (Mumbai) this Spring, Stockholm this summer, and anywhere else they want to send me!

Will post about China this weekend, and Florida once I return.

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All I want to do is read an article on salon.com, but for some reason MyYahoo keeps getting in the way. When I try to click on a link, or enter salon.com in the address bar, the page loads in this MyYahoo thing. Even when I see the article listed in the MyYahoo thing, and click on the link to it, the same MyYahoo page loads. It's like groundhogs day (the movie) over and overf AGAIN. I can't seem to get out of the stupid MyYahoo view and into salon.com. This is apparently some new co-branding that Yahoo and Salon have done, but to me, the user it is just annouying. In fact, events like this REALLY REALLY annoy me. As someone who is professionally interested in usability – sites that are not user-friendly tend to drive me nuts! I just want to read the article. I don't want to add it to MyYahoo … I don't want to use MyYahoo. I want nothing to do with it. In fact, I want to tell them how much it sucks, but of course I can't find a link to do that either. *sigh*

And, while I am on this topic … the fact that I can't find a "sign in" link on the upper-right side of my vox blog when I am not logged in to vox also frustrates me. It makes signing in a two or three click process and that is just not cool with me. I swear there used to be a sign-in link up there, but it has disappeared. Instead it lives at the very bottom of the page on the right, and I find scrolling all the way down there cumbersome.

I'm done ranting. I feel better.


China pics and posts to come. I've been delayed … the first weekend back I was sidelined by the worst cold I've ever had. The next weekend I procrastinated by unpacking and cleaning my room. This weekend I was having far too much fun with friends. I promise I'll get back on track soon. 

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Yep, I am Asia bound in less than 38 hours. So much to do before I go that I wonder if I will sleep at all! Spent 12 hours at work today … probably will do the same tomorrow — stupid power point slides! I'm just hoping that I can leave a bit earlier tomorrow so that I have time to pack without feeling like a crazy person.

It will be fun though …

First stop is Beijing where I have 3 days on my own to sightsee and settle in before my meetings begin … then I have 5 – 6 days of meetings followed by 3 days in Shanghai to shop, decompress and sightsee before heading home. I'm nervous and excited about it all.

Just hoping the power point gods are nice to me tomorrow so that I can focus and get sh*t done.

Right now, I need some sleep so that I can be somewhat civil to people tomorrow.

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sorry, mostly to myself for not keeping up with the goal.

off to Wyoming early tomorrow morning. i am hoping chicago o'hare reopens and cooperates so i can make it home! i think i have luck on my side — i missed Christmas last year with the whole denver airport shut-down, and it would be cruel to have that happen two years in a row.

off to bed right now, hoping for a few hours of sleep before holiday travel chaos begins.

happy holidays!

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Not much to say this morning, but I said I would write daily so here I am.

I am in shock that it is already 12/20! Where does the time go?

We have our "Holiday Gathering" at work today. It is basically snacks in the boardroom with a raffle. We don't call it a party because there are no DJs or dancing.

My roommate has a Christmas show at 10pm tonight at Rodeo Bar. Her Patsy Cline band will be performing, and it should be fun. I am really excited for her, but wondering how I can possibly stay up late enough to go to it.

Yep, I really don't have much to say.

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